Why is patience still a virtue?

The expression, 'Patience is a virtue' is one that causes me no end of confusion.  And, after much thinking, I have come to the conclusion that the phrase must have been coined in a far, far simpler time. One where people didn't have a full time job to complete, followed by spending an hour dodging idiots in Sainsbury's who can't seem to make up their minds about what to have for dinner, and who appear to insist on blocking every aisle.  Or a time when sitting down to that first bite of dinner meant that the telepathic sales people would call asking for 'Just 30 seconds of your time'.  A time where Sky didn't choose your busiest deadline day to cut your internet and keep you on hold for 45 minutes.  Or a time where you couldn't order something online, pay extra for next day delivery, only for it to turn up two days late.  In moments like these, why is patience still a virtue?

Perhaps if I had children and a husband this concept would be even more infuriating.  At which point I am grateful, that for now, I don't.

But seriously.  Why do we still deem patience as a virtue?  Because by being patient with people who clearly need a rocket up their arse it appears we are a nation of frustrated, hot headed morons.  By allowing patience to become a virtue we have allowed incompetence. We have encouraged lazy idiots who think that they have a duty to 'take their time', to 'forget about manners' and to simply 'wind us up', to continue in such an infuriating way.

I saw this recently... and I laughed, out loud (no, I did not lol, I do not lol, you will never catch me lolling).  It is true, right? I am not one for aggression, and I try to be as patient as I can, when I deem it is appropriate.  But when it comes to normal, every day matters, why do people have to really try you?

One thing that literally drives me up the wall is my name.  Don't get me wrong.  I love my name, I love my heritage and despite hating it as a child, I have grown to accept that it is different.  But seriously, when I have to spell my name out for the 18th time, phonetically,  and I am still being referred to as Miss Cara Sharkar, then yes, forgive me if I am a little frustrated.  And then there is the annual issue with the DVLA.  After amending my SWORN documents, that arrive every year, without fail, addressed to a Miss Gara Sahara, despite my best efforts to inform them, then again, forgive me if I sound irritated, annoyed, even stroppy.

Today was the best one so far.  I know my surname is Indian, and yes, we are renowned for our curries, but calling and asking for a Miss C Masala is a sure fire way for me to simply hang up on you.  If you plan to sell me a service or product that I don't want or need, at least have the decency to get my name partially right.

Patience needs to stop being a virtue.  Being patient with an incompetent person who simply can't be bothered to try, is not a virtue.  A virtue is a good trait, moral excellence, a beneficial quality if you like.  Well, I think what would be most beneficial, and thoroughly morally excellent, is if we stopped being patient with those who come in and out of our lives who really could do with a metaphorical kick up the backside.

I try really hard with the guy at Sky, who when my internet cuts out for the tenth time in a day, and he spends 10 minutes asking if I have pressed the reset button, to not yell, and scream, and shout and have a full on paddy down the phone.  Instead, I say in an ever-so polite tone 'Yes, thank you, Gary, I have tried that, I really have tried everything, is there nothing else you could do to help me? Please'. Do you think he would understand better if I screamed? It isn't in my nature to be rude.  But ignorance and incompetence are two things in life that I simply can't abide.

I am not for a second implying we should all just scream and shout just to get our own way.  But as a reserved nation, heading for a generation of incompetency, do we not owe it to ourselves to point out these matters?  To try some light motivational tactics or to encourage that teenager in your local Homebase to help you carry the 12 litres of paint you are so carefully trying to balance on the new lamp you have just purchased?

Next time you feel your patience being tried, offer a few words of encouragement, refer to the person by name (if they are actually wearing their name badge), make informal chat... and if all else fails, well, then I'm sorry, my patience doesn't stretch that far.